Honestly, I don’t particularly care for cats. I don’t hate them, I’m just completely apathetic towards them. They don’t do anything, other than eat and poop and sleep. They contribute nothing to society. They can’t protect you. They don’t do interesting tricks. They don’t even love you. They have absolutely no loyalty whatsoever to anything other than the idea of their next meal. They lounge around the house all moody and disagreeable. Maybe they will give you the honor of petting them. Maybe not. Maybe stay 5 feet away from it or it will scratch you whilst making some hideous sound. And yes, it will leave hair about. Here. And there. And over there. Oh, and some over here too.
At least a dog cares about its owner. You would have to be an absolute horror of a human being for your dog to stop treating you like you are the president of the universe. A cat on the other hand considers itself the master of the house. You are the pet in this relationship. Feed it, and in return you may bask in its presence for a moment. Forget to feed your dog, and it will lie around feeling sad. Forget to feed your cat, and you are now being hunted. I just don’t understand the appeal of having a cat, other than just the desire to have another living animal in your presence. They don’t play with you! They’re not loveable. They don’t run to the door when you come home, they don’t get sad when you leave. They just don’t care one iota about anything. Except when they’re hungry, or when they have an itch on the back. Then they know you. Then they will give you the pleasure of their company. And you don’t dare move until they are ready to move. Otherwise, your legs will be turned a lovely shade of red.
There was this cat at the school in Honduras that would get pregnant 2 or 3 times a year. Yet if you look around the school, you only see a total of about 4 cats. You know why? You know what the cat would do to its tiny, cute baby kittens? Let’s just say it was theorized that the cat would only get pregnant when it was hungry…
This is how the average housecat looks. And what you see there is the extent of exercise it gets in a normal day. I know it sounds like I hate cats, but I really don’t. I don’t mind them, I just don’t see what purpose they serve. A dog can serve a purpose – as a friend, a protector, a guide, a detective, a playpal for kids. A cat doesn’t do any of that. A cat is about as functional a pet as is a goldfish. Look at it this way: if you are alone in the house with your dog, and you get hurt or die, the dog will bark and yell and howl all day and night until someone hears and comes to check. If it can, it will break through a screen or a door and not run away, but go and bring someone back. You know what a cat will do if something terrible happens to its owner? Wait for you to die, and then eat you. Traitorous monsters is what they are.
A dog can have an unconditional love for its owner. A cat can have an unconditional love for itself. I really didn’t mean for this to be a comparison of cats and dogs, but that’s the natural progression of the discussion, I think. If someone is in a depressed state and they need some motivation to get out of bed each day, then sure a cat can fulfill that need adequately. Because it will not let you sleep until it has been fed. But if you want a companion, then to me a dog is a better choice. A dog looks at you and thinks “Oh master! You are my best friend and I love you! I want to play with you and kiss you and be with you forever!” A cat looks at you and thinks “Feed me or I shall feed on you.” Seriously, who invented cats? I’m kind of afraid of them, honestly.
Cary B Sands 